1. I'm still sick.
2. I still don't have a job.
3. I don't see myself being able to get one anytime soon.
4. I am semi-okay with that at this point. I have come to the realization that healing comes first. I can't help anyone else until I help myself.
5. I don't have a port anymore. But I have two huge, puffy scars to remind me of them.
6. I wish I still had my port. (Yes, you read that correctly.) There's a sense of security that comes with having the ability to get medicine directly into my body when I need it. And now I don't have that. It's kind of bittersweet.
7. I don't have a doctor. My doctor passed away at the end of 2014 and I have yet to find a new one. (If you're reading this, have Lyme, have a doctor, and live near me, let me know!) The inability to find a new doctor that can/will help me is not for lack of trying. It's the battle I had at the beginning of my Lyme journey all over again.
8. I still have a headache.
9. Every day.
10. I'm still hopeful. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't count my lucky stars, look in the mirror, and realize that I'm a lucky girl. It's been another year that has sucked the life right out of me. But I'm still standing. Somehow. (Actually I'm usually sitting/laying/reclining in some fashion)
And that's nothing to take for granted.
I can't promise you that this month of blogging is all going to be positive. I can't promise you that I'm not going to complain. I can't promise you 31 days of eloquently written thoughts. But I can promise you 31 days of the truth--be it ugly, happy, and anything in between.
And I hope that, in turn, you can promise me 31 days of effort. Understanding isn't always easy, I know. But it's possible. You can do it.
We did it together last year. We can do it again.
No comments:
Post a Comment