"What have you been up to?"

When I haven't talked to someone for a while, they normally say something along the lines of "fill me in on your life!" or "what have you been up to?" and in my brain it goes a little something like this:

Well...this morning I woke up and didn't know where I was for a second. I felt like I was hungover and I didn't even drink last night. I haven't drank in years, actually. It took me a second to stand up because the bottoms of my feet felt like they were on fire. Then I took about 10 pills and now I feel like I'm going to throw up and my insides are burning. Then the middle of my day was okay. Pretty normal. Now tonight my head is throbbing, I feel like I have ice picks in my eyes and ears and fire ants in my brain. I can feel each little piece in the bottom of my spine. My fingers are tingling. My face is swollen and numb on one side. I have a sharp pain where my gallbladder was, even though my gallbladder is gone. Going to go to bed in a little while and not be able to sleep. Probably get sad and anxious. And then do it all over again tomorrow, give or take some. 

So I answer "oh not much! Nothing exciting! How about you??" 

And normally that will do.