The line--what not to say as someone with Lyme.

I've written quite a few posts about what not to say TO someone with Lyme. I haven't, however, ever touched on what not to say AS a person with Lyme. 

Because, sick or not, there's still a line. 

There's a line between being needy and knowing when you need to ask for help. There's a line between telling your story and putting it onto someone else's shoulders when they haven't asked. And there's a line between helpful and being annoying. 

So...

1. Don't introduce yourself and include the word Lyme. That isn't something you need to announce right off the bat. "Hi, I'm Leigh" is good. "Hi, I'm Leigh and I have Lyme" is not. 

2. Don't drop your story on someone before they ask. Wait until they ask. Not everyone cares. And even if they do care, not everyone knows how to react. It's easier for everyone involved, including yourself, if you wait until you're asked--if you're asked. If they never ask, take it as a good thing. A break from talking about it, and from thinking about it, can do you a lot of good. 

3. Don't make it seem like everything is bad when it isn't. Just because you're sick doesn't mean you have to always be unhappy. Don't hold back your laughter when something is funny. Don't stop smiling. It doesn't make you any less sick, and it doesn't make your struggle any less real. It's okay not to be okay, but it's also okay to be okay. 

4. But, along the same lines, don't say you're okay if you aren't. Take a break. Say you can't go somewhere. Don't say you're okay just because you think you're supposed to. Or because you think that's what people want to hear. You matter. And your truth matters. 

5. Don't try to make it seem like you have it harder than anyone else. Even if you have been sicker longer than someone else, don't make a point of letting them know that. Even if you have had more surgeries or more procedures than them, it's not a competition. Even if you can't do the things you want to do, there is probably something holding them back in their lives too. You have it how you have it. They have it how they have it. It's not your job to compare. 

When it comes down to it, being sick doesn't give you an excuse. Sure, it makes things different for you. 

But it doesn't make you better, sicker, or worse off than everyone else. 

Because, sick or not, there's still a line.